Life is a Rollarcoaster
by GottaLoveTheSun
Summary: Takes place after Last Sacrifice. Rose lives her wonderful life with Dimitri and their child. But what will happen when she has another kid, but Dimitri is not the dad? Slight OOC. Rated T for swearing. **CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN**
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I am rewriting this story as of 08/15 **

**I haven't written in this story since like 2012 and my writing has improved A LOT since then, back then I wrote 10 chapters in 2 weeks, I'm not sure where that dedication went. Sigh.**

**I said on my last chapter that I would finish the next chapter after school, that was three years ago and I've finished high school, my procrastinating skills are actually amazing.**

**Apologies for any grammatical/spelling errors, I know for a fact there are a few here and there.**

**Disclaimer: All creative rights go to the great Richelle Mead  
><strong>

**Enjoy this story**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

"_You're holding back tears in your eyes__  
><em>_That boy wanna fight but I never see him fighting for you__  
><em>_He'll never realise what he's got__  
><em>_Until it's gone"_

_[Little Mix – Boy]_

**RPOV**

Nightmares and dark figures started pulling me in; the colours were wild and vivid and it was like my mind was a hurricane of darkness that I was being sucked into. All of my worst fears were at the same place and it was scaring the hell out of me. I did some things that were wrong and they were coming back to haunt me, God, why had I been so stupid? The guilt was like a heavy pressure on my lungs which was stopping me from breathing or speaking. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run. The black pit was filling up with dark water. I couldn't breathe, I was suffocating. My body was screaming at me to respond and to wake myself up. _Wake up, wake up! _

Screaming, I woke up and immediately sat up which caused my head to spin with dizziness, only then realising I was sleeping in bed with my Dimitri. He put his arms around me, trying to comfort me after my nightmare.

"Shh… it's okay. It wasn't real" he whispered in a soothing tone. I cuddled in closer, snuggling my face into his chest and tucked my head under his chin. I hated crying, it made me feel weak but Dimitri was used to seeing me at my worst and I've seen him at his worst, it's what couples do, so I didn't mind so much. Sobs came tearing out from my eyes and I was shaking with hysteria. Dimitri pulled me even closer, whispering comforting things in my ear but his words were just flowing into one ear and then out the other. His beautiful voice was making me fade away in to pitch black darkness.

I woke up early in the morning, finding myself alone in the bed. Dimitri had an early shift, I groaned because I had forgotten it, our shifts were like clockwork, they were etched into my brain, at least they should've been. He was guarding Christian while I guarded Lissa; we figured it would be easier, seeing as we had Aleksey to look after now.

"Mama, my shoe!" exclaimed a little boy crawling in my bedroom with a small blue shoe in his hand. That little boy was mine, my sweet little Aleksey. He looked a lot like me but acted so like Dimitri, at least that's what his mother had said Dimitri was like as a child.

He had a slight tanned complexion, the dark brown hair and the big brown eyes, all the genes that he had gotten from me. But he was tall for his age like Dimitri; at least I hoped he would get as tall as Dimitri.

Aleksey came crawling up to my bed. I didn't like him crawling round the house as it still has a lot of fixing up to do and he might crawl in to a splinter or something. We only just got the house; well it was a gift from Lissa, after we had Aleksey because she knew our regular room at the guardian quarters wouldn't be enough space to raise a child. I got off the bed and picked him up and walked towards his room.

His room was decorated in trains; he was absolutely obsessed with trains right now because it was the new craze for all four year olds.

"Aleksey, what have I told you about crawling round the house? It's dangerous, at least walk, you're 4 years old now" I told him.

I was very excited about him starting at my old school, St Vladimir's very soon. The teachers weren't, as they thought Aleksey would be a lot like me, which involved me throwing a book at my kindergarten teacher and calling her a fascist bitch, well I didn't know what it meant, so can you blame me? She tried me make me and Lissa write out our full names, you can't expect a 5 year old to write out Rosemarie Hathaway and Vasilisa Dragomir. Am I right?

Aleksey gave me his signature big, puppy eyes, which made me melt a little bit inside. That's right, the great Rose Hathaway has gone soft. He knew it would work and get his way, which was starting to annoy Dimitri, he said I would have to start to build up 'resistance' to it.

"I'm sowwy Mama" He said in his a baby voice. There nothing I loved more than his baby voice, another weakness that I would have to learn to build resistance to. I couldn't help but lose the stern look on my face, I would really have to start being strict with him nowadays.

He's probably gonna get used to getting his way with me in the future. I loved my little baby boy though, so I didn't mind too much. I would miss him when he goes to St. Vlad's, but I would still keep in touch, like all the time, unlike my mother. I did technically forgive her in the end for that but I was still a little bitter at the memories of being disappointed.

I hadn't let my Mom and Abe see Aleksey since he was born, I was still making up excuses for them not to come and that has managed to last for nearly four bloody years, they obviously weren't trying hard enough. I know what they will do. But they will meet him. Maybe not today, or tomorrow but they will someday.

"It's alright, honey. I forgive you. Now let's get you ready" I said, reaching for some clothes and his other shoe, which was hiding behind the biggest teddy bear in the world; another gift from Lissa and Christian. We managed to finish decorating Aleksey's room first. It was a large room, painted baby blue and light wooden flooring; it had two wardrobes in the corner, and a small toddler sized bed in the middle of the room, his own bathroom and the rest if the room was filled with his toys he got for birthdays and Christmases. Oh, and of course, the train themed stuff that he loved was stuck around his room.

Once I finally got Aleksey ready in his jeans and train patterned t-shirt, I quickly got dressed myself and we both got in the car. He loved to wriggle around a lot when I was putting his seatbelt on but after tickling him he finally gave up and let me belt him up. I know that Aleksey loved car rides, especially with me because I let him choose what song we could play, even if it was nursery rhymes, he loved it.

When we finally got there, I walked inside with him, holding his little hand in mine. He doesn't like going in on his own since he is still a little shy and Dimitri has been constantly telling me to let him go inside on his own but we both secretly knows he does the exact same thing when I'm not there. Once we spent ages talking about it which nearly turned into a screaming match and in the end we both just starting laughing about how stupid we were being for letting ourselves get angry over something so small, though we did talk about what will happen when he would grow up, Dimitri wants him to grow up to be a guardian. But I don't want him to if he doesn't want to. But with two guardians as parents, I wouldn't blame him if he wanted to carry on the family job.

"Look" I said, my finger pointing at a little girl sitting on a bench that he recognised her as well "It's Chrissa, go say hi to her".

We hadn't seen Chrissa for a while because Lissa had brought her to look after her while she was working for a few weeks and insisted on staying close with her little girl so she missed out on her school time, but hey, who wants to mess with the Queen? Chrissa is Christian and Lissa's daughter, hence the name, which I thought was a really good name combination, though I know Lissa wanted her name to contain 'Rose' or 'Andre' but I insisted to keep my name out of it.

"Hi Alex" She greeted him, using his nickname which I had grown to hate, I like the name Aleksey so I make everyone call him by his _full_ name and I didn't even let Dimitri nickname him. But I didn't say anything to Chrissa this, the last thing I needed was a crying girl and a scowling Lissa.

Chrissa was a beautiful little girl; she had all the best qualities of Lissa and Christian all in one little person. Her hair was a deep brown nearly black which flowed down her back, her well mannered self and gracefulness was inherited from Lissa while her ability to get what she wanted came from her father, probably something he taught her, knowing Christian.

Aleksey walked over to Chrissa and soon they were deep in conversation, well as much of an interesting conversation that two little kids can talk about. I watched them both admirably and then I felt my stomach rumble with a kick of nausea, I was starving. I was sure I ate this morning I thought, trying to picture the burnt toast that I smothered in jam. Or did I give that to Aleksey?

After leaving the nursery, I headed straight to work. I knew Lissa's schedule off by heart and by now she would be out of a meeting so I shoved my things into my locker and headed to her quarters.

"Hey Lissa" I waved slightly as I walked in to her quiet room keeping my voice at a minimum; I knew this is where she would like to relax after a stressing day as Queen; no doubt it was a stressful job. She was perched on the brown leather sofa lent up against the cream coloured walls. Unprofessionally, I plopped myself down next to her, sure I was her guardian and had to be all Zen like but I was her best friend first and from the looks of it, she needed a best friend right now.

"Good morning Rose" She replied with her head resting on the sofa and her eyes closed.

"Ugh, when did you become so formal" I said in a half joking and half disgusted tone. Her eyes snapped open and she scowled at me, wow, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.

"Since you gave that idea to Adrian to volunteer me as Queen" She spat at me, clearly something had happened today in one of her many meetings. To me, Adrian was still a touchy subject and his name was rarely brought up in front of me, of course only Lissa knew that. His last words to me would still echo in my head from time to time, and now he just acted like I wasn't there half the time, how are you supposed to react to that?

I put up both my hands in surrender.

"How many times do I have to apologise? I'm sorry!" I said in an exaggerated tone. She was still glaring at me angrily. Before she could answer, Christian walked in to my rescue with Dimitri following behind him, since he was his Guardian. I stood up and stalked to the back of the room putting on my guardian face, standing next to Dimitri. I gave him a small smile once our eyes met.

"Hi to you too, Rose" Christian said in a sarcastic tone, sitting down where I was sat a few moments ago. I gave him a genuine smile to greet him since he had come in to avoid the start of an argument between Lissa and me.

"Have you seen Chrissa today? I haven't seen her since yesterday" said Christian, guessing that I dropped my own son to school today.

I felt bad for him because he barely got to see his own daughter, partly because Lissa made him volunteer to stay most of the time and help her. I wouldn't blame her though. He was one of the people who nominated her. So did Adrian and Tasha.

Tasha was a subject that could never be brought up in front of Christian. Tasha was Christian's aunt, who raised him when his parents turned Strigoi. She also framed me for Tatiana's death. After we revealed who the real killer was to everyone, she was soon after beheaded. It was very medieval and all, but that was the punishment for high treason.

"Yeah, I saw her. She wants yet another play date with Aleksey and she was going on about how you're going to buy her some fancy pink shoes" I replied. Lissa, to my surprise, went to smack Christian on the arm.

"I told you not to show her that catalogue, now she will be begging for those shoes till Christmas!" said Lissa in a stern tone to Christian, as if he was a child. He just nodded and gave her a puppy dog look, which he liked to do when he was in trouble; he stole that trick off Aleksey.

We were stuffed in that room for around two hours and it was a pretty relaxing time, I liked having Dimitri in my presence, it helped me focus on my job. I also hated having to hear a bunch of Moroi arguing over some basic shit that Lissa was currently trying to talk time through, for example the age law, yes, that's still going on.

Lissa was trying to relax for a little while, not sure how she managed to do it with a room full of people but she did and, boy, did she enjoy the peace and quiet, she savoured every moment of it as much as she could. That is until my stomach rumbled again and broke that silence.

"Someone's hungry" said Lissa, stating out the obvious. "Haven't you eaten?"

"I did but-" I started and was cut off by Dimitri, I glared at him for cutting me off like that, it felt like being cut off by teachers when I was back at school.

"Sorry" he said apologetically, he was mainly saying that to me "It's nearly 4:00, and you have a meeting soon, your majesty" said Dimitri, I had to stifle a laugh at Dimitri saying 'your majesty', it annoyed Lissa like hell and it was so funny to hear him say it. Lissa groaned in frustration at the thought of being cooped up with a bunch of snobby royals for another hour.

"You can go pick up Aleksey now, Dimitri, his day care should be over soon" Christian dismissed him politely; Dimitri nodded at him before leaving the room. But not before I blew him a thousand of kisses from the other side of the room, trying to avoid Lissa and Christian looking at me while I was doing it. Dimitri smiled wholeheartedly before he disappeared from my view.

"So sparky" I started up a conversation "Do you know what element Chrissa is specialised in?" I asked curiously, reviving the name I hadn't used in a while, his eyebrow raised at the sound of it.

"Nah, she ain't shown any sign whatsoever, it's getting annoying to wait any longer" Christian huffed, leaning his chin in the palm of his hand. Lissa let out a quiet giggle, failing to stifle it.

"That's what you think Christian" she chuckled a little more. Christian stared at her with a mixture of blankness and confusion, but I comprehended with what she was implying. Christian hadn't obviously been present when Chrissa had first used her magic.

"What on earth…?" his faded off "When did..?" Apparently he couldn't even figure out what she was talking about, I internally rolled my eyes at his obliviousness.

"How else do you think that candle was relit the other night, silly? We ran out of matches, and I don't think she got a hold of them in the first place" replied Lissa "Takes after her daddy in a lot of ways. But this one won't, I'm sure of it" She patted her stomach gently. My heart leapt out of place and mouth made a perfect o shape. Guess Christian is not the only oblivious one around here.

"You're pregnant!" I half squealed and half tried to regain my guardian posture

"Yup" was all she could say. _Oh my god, how could she not tell me? __I shook at the negative thought that raided my head. I should've noticed the small yet slightly noticeable weight gain, the reluctance to drink any alcohol and the fact that the smell of chicken made her feel sick, all explained by pregnancy. __Damn it, Rose, screw your head back on properly._

"How could you keep this for me? I'm your best friend!" I scolded her. She laughed and placed her hand within her husband's and looked at me with a little guilt.

"It wasn't on purpose" she assured me "We wanted to surprise everyone at the same time, but someone" she coughed towards Christian's direction "already told half of Court way before the 3 month deadline"

"I couldn't control my happiness" mumbled Christian in defence

"More like you can't keep a secret" retorted Lissa. She looked at her watch. "Well, looks like you better get going Rose, if you want to get yourself and Aleksey ready for the dinner at my place tonight"

_Oh god, not another dinner party __I thought_

_I started a protest but bit my tongue as I felt the nausea in my stomach, I didn't have the energy to argue with her about this and just nodded in agreement_

"Sure, I can't wait" I said with false excitement. They both watched me walk out and Lissa gave me a wave just before I left the room. Then I could hear them talk and laugh with each other, by the time I was in the hall.

I felt the same pang of nausea in my stomach like I was going to be throwing up any second.

'_Maybe you should go to the pharmacy on the way back' _said a small voice at the back of my head.

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><p><strong>AN: I've kept most of the content from the original story but I might keep the lyrics thing that I'm doing to, you know, foreshadow stuff. **

**Read and review and I'll keep on writing ;)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I am aiming to make my chapters a lot longer at the moment, my target seems to be around 2k-3k but I think the chapter length will obviously vary throughout. Oh by the way, I'm pretty bad at writing in a child's point of view, I tried to add little kid things there without sounding too illiterate. Not entirely sure how that worked out… but either way I hope you like it **

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><p><strong>Disclaimer: All creative rights go to Richelle Mead except the plot and the characters Chrissa and Aleksey aka my little babies. <strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

_On the first page of our story  
>The future seemed so bright<br>Then the saint turned out so evil  
>I don't know why I'm still surprised<em>

_[Skylar Grey - Love the Way You Lie pt II]  
><em>

**Dimitri's POV**

I was working at home with Alek sitting on mine and Roza's bed, finishing up on some last minute paper work while we were waiting for Rose to finish work and come home. Alek kept himself busy by playing with all his toys that took him three separate trips to bring from his playroom to the master bedroom and was simultaneously telling me about his day at the day care, like he usually did this time of the day with me.

"First I was talking to Chrissa" his little voice filled the large room "She wants to come over some time by the way, she told me to tell you. Then mama went and we played with the toys for while until it was time for break, she spilt her juice box on herself and it was very funny" his suddenly gasped out of excitement "I haven't even told you the best part, there's this giraffe there and it's HUGE!" He said stretching his arms as far they could go "THIS HUGE!"

Some days I loved his little babbling but other days I wished he had a stop button on him or even a mute button. Definitely takes after Roza, I laughed at the memories of her babbling just like he is doing right now.

I chuckled at him, ruffling his hair; it was the exact same shade as his mother's,

"Your mama will be coming home in an hour, do you think we should pack all this up and get yourself ready for bed?" It was still early to be going to bed for him but he was starting to get himself ready and that took him twice as long as it normally would. From a distance, I could hear the door unlock downstairs, I glanced at the clock, surprised at how early she finished work. I saw her figure appear at the top of the stairs.

"Honey, I'm home!" She called out dramatically, holding her bag with something stuffed in at the top, it looked like a paper bag but I couldn't be certain. Alek basically jumped from the bed screaming and running towards his mother, you wouldn't have guessed that it had only been four to five hours since he saw her

"Mama!" he threw himself into her arms, Rose dropped her bag on the floor and it quietly thudded as she lifted him up and did a quick spin around. He started to giggle uncontrollably as she started to tickle him and walked into the room to throw him on the bed. His little body was starting to give up with exhaustion from all the energy he used from laughing.

"Hello Roza" I said, walking up to her and kissing her on the lips. I heard Alek gagging dramatically in disgust behind her. She laughed at his reaction while I could only roll my eyes "You're home early" I mentioned, hoping for an answer to feed my curiosity.

"Yeah, Lissa let me off to get ready for her dinner party, you're coming as well right?" she asked hopefully, she studied me for a bit and pouted when she took my silence as a no.

"It's too late for Aleksey, we only just got him into a routine, and I honestly don't think we should mess that up because it was hard enough to put him through it the first time" I looked at him starting to doze off in the middle of the bed, his little eyes fluttering for some rest. She let out a deep breath both in sadness for going alone and in awe at our little creation trying to sleep.

"I suppose you're right" she gave it and went to lift Alek into her arms, his small physique cradling against his mother, they fit together like a jigsaw puzzle "Come on my baby, let's go get you ready to bed" I could hear little pleads of protests coming from his mouth but his body was objecting to staying up any longer and soon enough he was drifting off very quickly. In the time she put Alek to sleep, I cleared up the mess on our bed and situated the toys into the corner of our room, careful not to make too much noise and making a mental note to move them out into the playroom later on.

Rose came back inside and gave me a sly smile, without another word she linked her hand around my neck and smashed out lips together. I responded by wrapping my arms around her slim waist.

"It's just the two us now, no one to disturb us…." she whispered in my ear cheekily. She started giving me butterfly kisses down my neck and was starting to drag us closer to the bed. As much as I was enjoying this, she was getting distracted and needed to go to her next shift; I pulled her off of me and saw that her bottom lip was sticking out in a pout.

"Haven't you got a dinner party to get ready for?" she stuck out her tongue at me as soon as I said that "You know you have to be there, she won't be able to handle the stress now she's carrying" She gave me a look that expressed either 'are you serious?' or 'did you seriously just play that card with me?'.

"I don't understand how I, Lissa's best friend, am the last person to find out about that?" she threw her hands up in frustration, ah so it was the first one "And I hate going to them stupid dinner parties, they are a fucking nightmare. If there's anything that I hate more than rich snobby royals, it's drunk, rich, and snobby royals" I chuckled lightly at her distress

"I only just found out from Christian, but from what I heard Lissa said it was meant to be a surprise until tonight or the next dinner party she had planned" I explained "They are both hoping for it to be a boy, I think" I said.

"That will be nice for them, finally a man in that family" Rose mumbled on her way out of the door as she went to get her bag from where she left it earlier and swiped her makeup bag and clothes on the way back in "I'm gonna get ready in the bathroom" she said heading off to the bathroom located in the room, without giving me time to respond to what she just said.

After a couple of minutes a noise caught my attention, I could hear a deep sigh through the bathroom door and then a small, like someone was punching through a wall. I knocked frantically on the door.

"Roza, are you okay?" I asked, worry clearly etched into my voice for her.

"I'm fine" replied a strained voice on the other side of the door "Give me five minutes and I'll be out"

I could a couple of other things being thrown around inside of the bathroom along with a long string of cursing which I frowned upon deeply, especially with Alek in the house. She came outside five minutes later with an exhausted expression on her face.

"What's the matter?" my eyebrows furrowed with concern "Why were you throwing things around in there?"

"I need to tell you something" she said simply as she pulled out something from behind her back, it was long and white. It took a while to realise it was a pregnancy test, I snatched it from her hand and saw it said positive with two little numbers under it stating '2-3'.

"You're pregnant?" my heart filled with love, I could see her eyes starting to tear up but not with the same happiness that she did when she found out she was have Alek. "What does the little numbers mean?"

"This one tells you when you conceived, so that means it was two to three weeks ago" she said blankly like her voice had been ripped away of emotion. The pieces were very slowly coming together in my head.

"That's impossible" I laughed it off "I only got back from Brazil last week" I said referring to my most recent assignment, her face looked guiltier and guiltier by the second. "Tell me this is wrong Rose" my voice started to become angry. "Rose?"

"It was a mistake Dimitri" she said quickly and desperately "It didn't mean anything, I'm so sorry" the tears came streaming down her face as she tried to reach out for me, I flinched back from her touch.

"You cheated on me" that wasn't a question; she bit her lip and nodded "Why? Wasn't I enough for you, Rose, huh?" my tone turned cold and my words were getting louder, a part of me was hoping this was all a dream but another part has been expecting this from day one "Does this happen every time I'm away? Does my love mean anything to you?! Does Aleksey mean ANYTHING to you?!"

"No! NO!" she objected "It wasn't like that Dimitri, I swear it was just one time" I tried to turn back to her but she had a death grip around my arm and spun me back around and her eyes were filled with sorrow now "I love you. Please believe me when I say that" her voice was barely a whisper. I resisted the temptation to scoop her up in my arms and tell it was going to be alright, this time she really messed up.

"Love is not enough when you go flinging yourself around like a whore every chance that you get!" she physically flinched at the term whore and it was a low blow on my side as well. Rose's pleads quickly transformed into fury and our back and forth continued.

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><p><strong>Aleksey's POV<strong>

I pulled the covers over my head to block out the noise. I could hear mama and dada fighting in their room. They said a lot of rude words. The fighting went on and on. I couldn't take it. I started crying my eyes out, hoping they would notice, I threw my toys around the room. This was useless because all my toys were soft toys.

I climbed out of bed and put my coat and shoes on. I knew the way to Aunt Lissa's house. I could stay there with Chrissa, I liked Chrissa. Mama didn't even notice when I walked out of my room. I opened the door and the cold air hit me on my face, I was glad I had my coat with me. I pulled my hood up and walked out.

I knew Aunt Lissa and Uncle Christian didn't live that far from us, it was meant to me a short walk. Only a few blocks away from out house, I think. Right now, I was standing on a street that I didn't recognise, I didn't know which way I should go.

Mama always told me that if I got lost I should wait by the swings. But where were the swings? I kept walking down the road that I was one and I kept looking back to see if mama or dada came rushing to find me. It was very dark outside and I was scared, mama always told me that I shouldn't be alone outside in the night.

Maybe if I turned the corner ahead of me I would see Aunty Lissa or even Mama, she said that she had to go to her house today and that I wasn't allowed because it was too late. I wasn't exactly sure where Aunty Lissa's house was now…

Where else could I go? I wanted to cry but I needed to be brave. It was so cold outside. I wanted to go back home, I wanted my mama and dada to stop fighting; I wanted to be warm inside of my bed.

I wasn't sure what I was looking for now. I was just walking further away from the house. There was a man there, he was really tall, and the kind of tall you have to stretch your neck to see, like a giraffe. I noticed he was Moroi too.

"Excuse me, tall man. Where are the swings?" I asked him, my voice sounded weird, like it usually did after I cried. He looked at me with a curious face. He had big eyes that were brown, like mine were.

"Are you lost, little boy?" He asked me back. He had a weird accent. I nodded.

"Yes I am, but Mama always said if I'm lost, wait by the swings. She would meet me there" I said. He looked kind.

"They are over there, shall I take you there?" he asked me gently, I should've screamed 'stranger danger' like we learnt in school, but this man looked friendly.

"To the swings please" I said, lifting out my hand for him to hold it, he looked at me surprisingly and slowly put his hand in mine.

"Ok then" He said back to me and we walked towards the park.

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><p><strong>AN: Read and review! **

**My last chapter didn't get as much response as I had hoped, but usually first chapters don't so I don't mind so much.**

**Tell me what you think of this story so far..! **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm so happy of all the responses I've gotten from the last chapter, thank you so much. I didn't have the time to reply to the reviews because I thought you guys would appreciate another chapter rather than my thanks. **

**The last couple of days have been pretty busy for me, most of it involved enrolling for schools and results day which was tiring but I somehow managed to find the time to write this. Don't expect much updates in the next couple of weeks, which applies to all my stories, because I've managed to fill up my time until I start lessons again. **

**But for now, enjoy this chapter xx**

**Chapter 3**

_Isn't anyone trying to find me  
>Won't somebody come take me home<br>It's a damn cold night, Trying to figure out this life  
>Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new<br>I don't know who you are but I'm with you_

_[Avril Lavigne – I'm with you]_

**Rose's POV**

"If you think so little of me Dimitri, then I'm leaving and you can bet your ass that I'm taking Aleksey with me as well!" I screamed at him, shoving him in the chest with as much force as I could generate at that precise moment, which wasn't a lot frankly, I knew that I shouldn't have resorted to physically expressing my anger but goddamn the things he was saying was making my blood boil with rage.

"You're not leaving me if I'm the one chucking you out of here, and you can think twice before taking MY CHILD!" he shouted back to me emphasising on the words 'my child', pushing my hands back away from me which made me stumble back a lot more than I would like to admit, it caught me off guard. I recovered quickly and stormed off to Aleksey's room around the corner to get him out of here; he sure as hell was coming with me.

God, the nerve of that guy, I couldn't believe he called me a whore, it could've been a lot worse, he could've called me a blood whore and if he said that then he would've seen the true wrath of Rose Hathaway.

I half expected Dimitri to follow me, hold me close and tell me everything was going to be okay, but I really dug myself a massive hole and I will still expecting everybody around me to fill it.

I tried to calm down my emotion before entering my son's room, he shouldn't have heard what he did and he definitely shouldn't see me so out of control of my emotions.

But he wasn't there.

"Sweetie, where are you?" I called out and waited for his adorable voice to call out 'mama'. No reply. I checked under the blankets and in the bathroom thinking he would've hid out here during our screaming match.

I mean, they don't happen a lot but when they do Aleksey likes play 'hide and seek' under his bed, as he likes to tell me. I checked under there and was disappointed to find no one there. I rushed back to Dimitri.

"He's not in there, Dimitri. He's gone!" I cried out revealing my horror stricken voice, praying his paternal instincts would dominate his feelings of anger towards me right about now. I rushed back into his room and noticed Aleksey's coat and shoes were also missing from the coat rack as well.

That was really bad, it meant he left himself.

I grabbed my phone I left just outside in the hallway and dialled the first number that came in my head, hoping that the conversation would end in good news. After five rings, the call was finally answered. I had to pace up and down the room to keep myself harm

"Rose, where are you? The dinner is about to start, you should've been here ten minutes ago" said Lissa in her usual worrisome voice. My voice was slightly uneven when I spoke back to her; for once she had an actual reason to be worried about my absence.

"Lissa, have you by any chance seen Aleksey? I think he's gone missing. Dimitri and I had a fight and I told him that…" I could see Dimitri from the corner of my eye and I realised now wasn't the time to direct the situation on to myself I needed to focus on "Aleksey" I choked out the last bit of my though and simultaneously trying to explain why I was originally calling, that other problem can wait "He's gone and I can't find him"

"No I haven't, oh my god" I heard her put the phone to her chest, muffling her voice

"Christian!" she called out "Check outside for Alek, he's gone missing" followed by a few other words she said to him which I didn't get, I also didn't bother correcting her with her name instead I waited patiently in the silence. "Sorry Rose, he hasn't seen him at all" she came back to the phone "Shall I call some people to help you find him?" she asked.

I hung up on her without bothering to reply to her question and I grabbed my coat and shoes and raced out the door followed by Dimitri. I still had my phone grasped tightly in my hand and was calling nearly everyone I know. I even called my mom for Christ's sake, that's how desperate I was. I was standing outside the front door frantically walking up and down the driveway.

Dimitri came up behind me after I finished talking on the phone to the day care in hopes that he might've gone there.

"God Rose, you're so irresponsible! How could you miss a child walking out the front door?" He said angrily. I was taken aback by the statement, offended that he was purely blaming me for being in this situation.

"Last time I checked, you were right there too, the one who was shouting loud enough to scare our child away, this is much as your fault as mine!" I yelled, loud enough for anyone in a hundred yard radius to hear. Before he had the chance to answer I ran forward in hopes of avoiding yet another inevitable argument.

The phone in my hand vibrated breaking the silence of my search down the road.

I glanced at the caller ID for it to come up as 'unknown'; I hesitated to pick it up in case someone important called with the whereabouts of Aleksey.

"Hathaway" I stated monotonously into the phone, if it wasn't an emergency, it wasn't worth my time that's for sure but that doesn't mean this couldn't be about Aleksey as well.

I could feel my lungs nearly collapsing at the sound of the voice on the other end of the phone.

"Mama, where are you?" the sweet angel's voice asked so innocently, I let out a sound that came out as a cry and laugh mixed together out of pure joy of hearing Aleksey's voice which caught Dimitri's attention not that far behind me, still carrying an annoyed look at me. I'm surprised his face doesn't just stay that way.

"Who is it? Did they find him?" his questions invaded my ears but I pushed him back to focus on the call, he surprisingly gave in and stood there patiently, waiting for me to reply to the phone call.

"Where are you, baby? I've been so worried" I said to him and I could hear Dimitri grumble something next to me that sounded something along the lines of 'I've been worried about him too'. But it was not the time to start a fight in the middle of the streets.

"Mama, I was lost and then this really nice man helped me find the swings. Can you come soon Mama?" My heart dropped at what he just said and the thoughts that were spiralling around about this stranger and they were not good thoughts.

"But wher-" He hung up before I could finish what I was going to say which immediately was cut me off.

"Where is he Rose?" Dimitri asked as soon as I put the phone down. For the first time tonight I saw the pure protectiveness feeling that I loved to get from him, one of the things that made me fall in love with him in the first place.

'_This is your fault, you know, it would be your fault if he ended up dead too' _said the voice lurking in my head again

"He's by the swings. In the park" I simply said in my guardian voice and we both ran as fast as we possibly could for the park, it was a minimum of a five minute run from here. My head should've been focused on the task but my mind was drifting away.

"_Mama, look!" squealed Aleksey, trying to unbuckle himself from the pram. I laughed at his eagerness and knelt down to take off the buckle. _

"_Stop moving you little squirt, you're going to hurt yourself" I said, attempting to hold him back long enough to sort this buckle out. _

"_Roza, don't call that" Dimitri laughed from behind the pram, he had the baby bag in one hand and was pushing the pram with the other. Not gonna lie, he looked really hot all paternal and stuff._

"_Hurry up mama, I want to go on the swings" he cried out desperately, I just managed to undo the buckle followed by a small 'click' before he basically jumped out of the seat, trying to run straight for them._

"_Aleksey sweetie, calm down, you'll get your turn on them" I tried to keep my cool "You can't just run off like that, it's very bad"_

"_Why?" curiosity got the best of his short attention span and he stopped fidgeting to get out of my grip._

"_Because you might get lost, honey, and we don't want that to happen. Somebody could take you" I explained to him in the simplest terms that I could think off. I was aiming to scare him enough to keep close to us but not enough to never have fun again; lord knows that's happened before. _

"_What happens if I get lost?" he asked and to my surprise that was actually a really good question to ask. _

"_If you ever get lost, wait by the swings and I'll always find you there. He nodded his little head persistently_

"_Okay mama, I will do that" I rewarded him with a massive smile and he gave me one back in return._

I nearly slapped myself for not figuring it out sooner.

We arrived at the park not that long later, it took us less than three minutes to sprint to the swings.

"Mama, I'm here" Aleksey yelled from the swings as soon as we came into view. Dimitri lifted him from the swings straight away and right into his arms. I don't think Aleksey realised what was going on because he kept asking why dada was nearly in tears. I was kinda worried that Dimitri would take out his anger on him but he wasn't like that and I cursed myself for thinking that he would, especially since he had to put up with that in his childhood.

"Mama, this kind man helped me when I was lost" Aleksey started explaining, pointing to the person who was standing next to the swings with a great big smile on his face

"Hey Kiz'" he greeted me, I rolled my eyes at how happy he looked knowing perfectly well that Janine had probably called him and told him he was missing but I was too relieved to take out my anger at him.

"Thanks Abe, I owe you one" I said, not bothering to ask why he was in town or how he managed to run into my child of all people

"Anything for my daughter" he said, holding out his arms, expecting a hug, I raised my eyebrows at the gesture and he soon let his arms drop in disappointment "I think you should probably teach your little squirt about the important lesson of stranger danger. We wouldn't want him to run off with some strange man"

I dismissed Abe quickly once I had reassured him that I would try and get in contact with him and my mom together because he left for Europe for some business. It wasn't at the top of my priorities at the moment but I have to make up for lost time sooner or later.

Dimitri and I walked home with Aleksey in Dimitri's arms, starting to nod off again. We were both pretty silent throughout the walk home and neither of us said anything until we got into the house.

I, once again, forgot my house keys which earned me another 'you're so irresponsible' look from Dimitri.

Not going to lie, I was really angry at what Aleksey had done; I thought he was smart enough to take what we taught him about strangers and Strigoi to make sure he knew what he was going, apparently not.

"How could you run off like that, Aleksey?"I started as soon as Dimitri put him down onto the living room couch "We were worried sick! What if the man you thought was 'kind' wasn't Abe and instead it was a kidnapper or a Strigoi? What would you do then? You would do nothing, because you would be dead by now!"

Aleksey was in tears at how angry I was, I never shouted at him in my life, I mean sure I would scold him every once in a while when he did something morally wrong, but this was out of proportions. I had every right to shout at him for this

"Wh-"I started to rant at him again before being promptly cut off by Dimitri who was apparently playing 'good cop'.

"Rose, shut up for god's sake" he cut me off and moved from standing next to me to sitting next to Aleksey on the couch "Alek, all your mama is trying to say is that what you did was a very bad thing. It could get you hurt and we were very worried about you, we love you" he explained in a gentle, comforting tone "Why did you run away?"

Aleksey took a deep breath before saying anything, mainly looking at me in case I started to shout at him again.

"You and mama were fighting and I didn't like it" he said shamefully "I was scared" he looked up at me with tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. Dimitri carefully wiped away the tears that leaked on to his cheek and Aleksey enveloped him into a hug and was sobbing quietly.

It broke my heart that he saw me as the bad guy in this, I probably deserved it though.

"Don't leave us Dada" his voice muffled in Dimitri's chest "I need you here to read me my bed time story and I need you to help me do my hair in the morning. Mama didn't mean to be bad" he apologised for me, his voice still covered by Dimitri's jumper.

Dimitri ruffled his hair slightly, holding in a sigh at the last sentence he said, before pulling him back up in a sitting position to talk to him.

"How about we go upstairs and get you into bed so me and your mom can talk this out" he said in the same soothing tone as before.

"No shouting?" he asked with pleading eyes, looking at both me and

"No shouting" He promised, looking at for the same reaction and I repeated the same promise.

We both stared as we saw his little feet hit the ground with a light thud and saw him walk all the way up to his room without out assistance. Once we were both declared he was out of hearing distance, we decided to have a civilised conversation.

"I can't believe he didn't feel safe in his own home" Dimitri sounded really disappointed "It reminds me of how I felt around my father" he cringed immediately after saying that

"I know and it's my entire fault" I said solemnly, sitting down on the sofa with my head in my hands, I felt his body sit down as well but with a fair amount of distance between us.

"Let's just be honest Rose, we were fighting a lot even before this news, I don't know if it was the pregnancy that was starting the fights or the fact that we just have high stress jobs but it's not right for Alek to come home to a place he considers unsafe" he breathed out before continuing, he looked at with an unreadable expression on his face "You've never shouted at him like that before and I know now that you aren't the same person I fell in love with. I know we've both been through a lot and have changed but maybe we've changed so much that we don't… synchronise as much as we did before. I think I just hoped things would resolve by itself but now I'm not so sure"

"What are you trying to say?" I gulped, hoping this was all a horrible nightmare that I would soon wake up from

"I think its best that I move out, whether it's temporary or permanent, I think it's good that we have some space between us. For now, I'll pack a few things and go to guest housing for the night but tomorrow I'm going to start looking for an apartment with a room that Alek can stay in to" he stood up and headed upstairs for a while.

My whole world was crashing right in front of me and I didn't know what to do about it, it was like I was aware of what was going on but couldn't move or do anything about it. I was frozen.

I watched at Dimitri came downstairs with his overnight bag and headed to the door. He gave me one last look and I took in all of his features at one.

"I'm sorry Roza"

And then he left.

**A/N: So the real reason my updates are literally taking months to write out is because for this story I have been going back and adding more content and making the chapters lengthier and more exciting. I guess I was just trying to write for myself for a while which I haven't done in a long time. **


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